The Human Mind, Feelings, Emotions and Chronic Pain ‘If you have that’


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Dalai Lama

 

Picture1By @ShaunyGibson – Used to be @ ShaunyNews

When you sit and try to define your purpose on this Earth when you ask who and what you are, we all do this. The irony is many will dismiss that they do this, so go look at that image above again, see it? When you are in a state of TOTAL feeling, at one with yourself and life and the universe, you care. When you care you hurt more, it comes with the packaging. I see so many people afraid to ‘Feel’ because they refuse to take on the burden that comes with it, that would be hurt or loss, whatever, you know? People refusing to go the full way and be true to themselves in fear they might get too close to something. I am not afraid of dying, I am afraid of dying now and leaving my partner too 8ea41f8ff202634e3ff7445fd86ae973 (1)soon. To get to that way of thinking an ‘Event’ must happen. For me the event happened in childhood and guides me now as an adult, in reality it is amazing, many call it God, I just call it amazing, superb, a blessing, lucky and other such words. When I say this to a friend who knows I live in utter agony they say “How can this be, you are Disabled and in pain” To get something we must first lose something. It can be the death of a person, the death of a habit, to forget someone or something, whatever it is, you need to lose before you feel what many like me do and see our World for what it really is, it’s a total hell hole in every sense of the word, but we do as individuals show and see act’s of love and kindness from others, but to gain we lose first, we must lose to get, for me it’s THAT SIMPLE, I was lost for a long time, it was lonely and hard, but all the time my partner and 2 sons were there, now here I am, smiling, happier than I have ever been, why? Because I lose BADLY. So not much else to lose here, so I love what I have and understand that, the pain will do what it will, so I choose life

Song made from the an Irvine Welsh book, then the movie Trainspotting  For those outside the UK who don’t know this Movie 
Part 1 – The beginning

Part 2 – The end…. Both filmed in my City, Edinburgh, Scotland

We all deny our own existence, many of us are wide awake and watching, listening and learning, I am one of these guys. I had a friends, 17 years a friend may I add, she is from Columbus120380-118513 Ohio in the US of A. She said “Shaun has changed” She wasn’t being nasty or rude, far from it. But I felt in an instant ‘Friends don’t do this’ What this is, is she stopped being my friend. When I got my (YES, YES I AM TALKING ABOUT MYSELF, THIS IS MY PAGE, I WRITE THIS IS OFTEN WHAT I DO, NOT ALWAYS) 😀 Sorry I had to get that out the way. Anyway, when I got my Disability, Chronic Pain Syndrome, it then upgraded to the 22827c360539999fff306fa99d5f1775‘Devils Disease’ Fibromyalgia it took things from me, abilities to do things, loss of many things I would before do, friends, family, respect, love, it gives sufferers the attributes and feelings of Motor Neuron Disease and Parkinson’s Disease I could go on. But I am a great believer in Karma. As I sit here now I would say 80% of my immediate family don’t think I am disabled, the 20% would be my Partner, two sons and closest friends. Not one family member is ‘cool’ with Fibromyalgia at all, they say like my friend in the USA did “Shaun has changed” And it gets boring and you do smile after a while, but you learn to surround yourself with people who don’t talk about it and you just have fun with, my partner, sons, close friends and a few on-line also. It is ‘Normal’ I have friends from School, these guys are all super cool, they mock my disability, so it’s all good, I wouldn’t have it any other way. To one mate I am ‘limpy’ for example 😀 This is how I want my disability to be, sadly around certain people it is near impossible because THEY have the problem you see?

Starter pack for the judgemental or is it just 'mental' :D

Starter pack for the judgemental or is it just ‘mental’ 😀

1dd6d21b566548f6552659025a6749baSome of my friends are people I done football with, coaches, players, players families, kids families, for 15 years till I had to stop 5 years ago now, some from school, guys I knew inside out, guys I held hands with at funerals of their parents, friends who are in-fact blood, people who you treat as blood, like Family. These people I know and they know me. When the Disability hit most were all “Oh Shaun I am sorry” I was like “Don’t you dare, no sympathy’ and it was never mentioned again. They all get it now 100%. I can’t make plans with a good mate who is a chef for example, we are REAL good mates, very close, as close as a brother should be. When I cancel they are all cool. With Family no understanding at all. I am sorry I have to say this, the person who said it will read this. I was told over the phone by a family member “You are always in bed” and “You never go out” At first I was angry but them my anger turned to “They are the ones in pain, not me” So again glance at the image above quickly and read it again

See, when you lose things, and they keep going, doesn’t stop, it becomes your ‘Reality’ and you understand and respect this is the way it is. Once you get to that way of thinking you can moveimgres-5_med on, you begin to smile again and be at peace with yourself and as I say, surround yourself with people who enjoy life, people who laugh every day, people like me who demand we have fun. So I go back to what that person told me, I said above “They are the ones in pain, not me” is when I figured out the nasty hurtful words and other issues. I am 41 and I love to learn, I need to learn, I have an open mind on ALL subjects and I believe this is healthy and needed, both apply. So when I understood the other person, the person who couldn’t get why “I am always in the house” or “I am always in bed” (Neither of which are true, not that I care, I don’t judge others) I understood that they were the ones, sadly, with the problems. See I learnt not so long ago, people who attack others with words, words the target won’t hear, mock or joke about a person in their absence, they are the ones with deep rooted problems

220px-Two_Dimensions_of_Emotion.gifThe people I surround myself with are just amazing people, Partner, kids, mates, whoever but others I can’t figure out, so I stopped. I realized they were figuring me out, or trying to figure me out so I gave in, if a person can’t figure a person out or doesn’t get a certain person I say sever the ties, walk away, stop trying to 2nd guess when you ARE wrong about people. Why spend time and brain power and time trying to figure a person out? 😀 How sad is that? I leave a smile because I have only very recently figured this out. I take the smile back and feel sad for these people. Not many, really, a handful. My parter will say “I don’t and can’t feel your pain or understand your mind especially on medication, BUT I AM HERE AND I LOVE YOU” that is all I needed to hear from the woman I love. She judges nobody, in our 25 years knowing each other as kids, primary school kids to now as adults late 30’s and 40 ish I have never once heard her say 1 (ONE) bad word about another. So ‘Surround yourself with the right people’ comes into play, I am around a goddess in every sense of the word, make no mistake I am the luckiest lad this side of Mars for managing to convince my partner to spend the rest of her life with me, so for that, I am blessed, happy, relieved! and in love. When all is said and done, this blog was fun, it made me smile because I demand I smile, to be the opposite is to not live, so easy choice right? Well not really, I know people who have killed themselves who have what I have, I know people talking about, people who have tried to take their life, people who were laughing one day and dead the next, some hide away from the world, I guess I hide away from MY world, the world I was born into, but I keep hold of the world I created for myself, anyone is welcome in, just knock the door, I will put the kettle on 😀 My partner loves me medicated or not, people actually judge me for being on Dr’s prescribed medication and to top it off most of the people who judge take illegal drugs and get drunk and fight and cause trouble where ‘Sociably Acceptable’ alcohol is allowed to roam free and destroy people, can you feel the Irony? I do, it hurts, wait! I hurt anyway!

This ring true for anyone?

This ring true for anyone?

fibromyalgia-s13-chart-of-conditions-that-mimic-fibromyalgia

People die, many are worse, but this is bad, real bad, it makes loved ones not talk. Agreed loved one? I have changed, this changed me, try and be nice aye?

So look one final time at the image above. Makes sense now right? I have defined a meaning to it’s fullest, words from the Dalai Lama, and that’s hard to do right? Some of us can ‘Feel everything so deeply’ We are the ones who hurt the most, who take bad news the worst, we are the ones when say? one of our kids move out takes it hardest. It comes with the territory. To be at total one with yourself, to understand you in any shape, form, health whatever is hard to do. But once you can see it clearly it opens up amazing things in your mind. The pain sucks for sure, the medication sadly is enjoyable as it takes the pain away. I am ready for almost anything, I can take almost anything and I can understand almost everything and I now understand other people, I see them clearly now, lost, pretending to be what they are not, not on purpose, it’s just their ways and I respect others ways. I guess what I am saying is, I respect YOU for what you are, even if I have no time for you or I don’t like you, whatever, I respect you. Respect me back please. So this is for all my friends I lost, who are lost, this is for the people like me who are defined by the images I added. I never ask for sympathy, I would however like certain family members to just walk into my home and say “How you doing today you fragile fool” 1st of January and look what I did, I will leave you with the image of how 2014 ended and how 2015 started, and I wouldn’t have it ANY other way, these are battle wounds, I look at all my bumps and bruises as that, my prize for daring to live for daring to laugh and have fun in life. My new years resolution is to sort my sleeping pattern out, I will try but I am not holding my breath,  for long anyway…. Happy New Year 😉

 I Dropped the hoover on my ankle/shin and ripped some skin and 'I think' tore some ligaments. No break.. But agony and bruised like a break

I Dropped the hoover on my ankle/shin and ripped some skin and ‘I think’ tore some ligaments. No break.. But agony and bruised like a break

Now go have one last glance at that image at the very top and see if you understand it now 😉

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Taboo Series: Disability, being alone and this ‘Spirit of Christmas’ issue


 

christmas-tis-the-season-jolly-facebook-timeline-coverBy @ShaunyGibson – Used to be @ ShaunyNews

I know, I know, It’s Christmas and I probably should be on my sofa chilled out with a beer after Christmas dinner. Well sadly I can’t because of pain and all that amazing Jazz plus I don’t drink. What I suffer from is Fibromyalgia and ‘Fibro’ doesn’t know Christmas day from Pancake day it just keeps giving pain that is unbearable, the effects of Parkinson Disease and also Motor Neuron Disease and other really harsh disabilities like MS and ME and more. So for me I loved the day, loved to see my kids open presents and be with my Son, his partner and my Partner with my oldest son coming late with his partner

Fibromyalgia makes this time of the year almost impossible for people with made up invisible not hurting disabilities, disabilities that people in your life know more about than your Dr, I say that as it’s what society tells us, I find it strange that you often have to be in a wheelchair before someone will understand why you can’t visit them, I know people are dying, I know people who have died and people who have lost so this is where my own personal guilt comes into play, but as I am told by almost everyone, don’t think this way. Here are our symptoms: http://www.fmnetnews.com/fibro-basics/symptoms

Pain All Over – People describe fibromyalgia pain as deep muscular aching, throbbing, shooting, stabbing, or intense burning. Muscle groups used the most may hurt more. In addition, the severity of regional pains can make your fibromyalgia symptoms worse. The pain is unimaginable if you don’t suffer Fibro. This is the part that many can’t live with and we see suicide happen. The pain is very hard to describe, the best I can do is ‘All over toothache’ others have other ways of explaining the pain, for me all over toothache pain is what I feel. I feel like I have JUST broken several bones or snapped muscles, but it is only all day every day 😀 so it’s cool really. Many stay depressed and suicidal, I have been there and back, lost friends and family over it, all this  b@stard illness does is take from us all. 3% of the World’s 7 Billion populous suffer from Fibro. In the UK we grade it 1 to 10. Many are 2/3 just having pain in one area, I was 10 and left the pain clinic as it was pointless but I still help the pain team with sitting and speaking to Dr’s and Pain experts from all over the World at the Ashley Ainsley Hospital in Edinburgh, it has a few large halls that sit a few hundred or more. So although I suffer I spend more time helping others. It’s the old adage “To help others is to help yourself”

Fatigue – Exhaustion can be one of the most incapacitating fibromyalgia symptoms. You may feel as though your arms and legs are weighted down by concrete blocks and your body may be so drained of energy that every task requires great effort. I can be wide awake then *PING* Sleeping or sleepy. Heavy dry eyes, can happen an hour or 2 after a good sleep or at night. So too much sleep and not enough sleep. A pain it is, waking early and sleeping early is all our goals but if we are in agony and it’s 3am we have to just deal with it. For me this is the most annoying probably. I think if I fix this (Like now) for good I will live better. But I am at the mercy of Fibro

Sleep Difficulties – It’s not just about falling asleep. Repeat arousals prevent you from reaching deep, restorative sleep, so you wake up feeling as though you have been hit by a Mack truck. An overnight sleep study may show symptoms of repeat arousals, but a specific sleep disorder may not be found. For the past 5 nights I have been asleep early and up early, BRILLIANT!!! Before and I am sure it will come back I am up a day, down a day, I am missing half my life sleeping. That hurts when you miss family as I do. This is the single most difficult one that none of our families can understand and all we really try to get them to get.

Brain Fog – Trouble concentrating, retaining new information, and word-finding are common fibromyalgia symptoms that seriously interfere with daily functioning. You may be easily distracted and this symptom appears to correspond to the severity of pain (as though the brain is consumed by the pain, limiting your ability to perform cognitive tasks). This is the Parkinson Disease area of the disease. I can be talking and half way through talking *GONE* 😀 What I was talking about just vanishes, with friends/family it’s ok as they remind me, with strangers it’s embarrassing and I don’t like that bit. I tend to just not talk much now to strangers unless it’s email or type chat. Just makes it easier. This is the one thing (Pain aside) we all hate, I have to leave notes on my PC/Laptop/Phone etc for things like “Go to the toilet” or “Take Medication”

Morning Stiffness (Now Now 😀) – You may wake up to enhanced muscle soreness with fibromyalgia, but you probably also feel more stiff than usual. The cause of these muscle symptoms is unknown, but warm water and gentle stretching usually help alleviate them. I can’t move much for an hour after awakening. Often I need a cup of tea and medication before I can go about my day. Sometimes I just have to get up and walk like I am made of cardboard in agony. Also amazing fun, lol

Muscle Knots, Cramping, Weakness – No matter how much you try to relax your muscles, they may feel tense. Many contain rope-like knots called my ofascial trigger points, making you more susceptible to muscle cramping and weakness.The pain of fibromyalgia may also be a source of muscle weakness. These are very similar to Motor Neuron Disease, I get this 24/7, my hamstrings, calf muscles are worse but anywhere we have muscles/tendons etc sufferer friends and I get pain a if there has been a partial tear in any given area, go to the hospital, get a scan, all good. Very hard to diagnose us, but they hooked me up to electrical nodes and made pain happen by pulling and pushing my muscles all over, it showed increased pain activity so proving the pain was there

Digestive Disorders – Constipation, diarrhoea, abdominal pain, gas and bloating, irritable bowel, and nausea are found in roughly 40 to 70% of fibromyalgia patients. Acid reflux and a slowed digestion are also common. If you take strong pain killers it’s important to take anti-acid tablets or you will ruin your insides badly.

Headaches/Migraines – Recurrent tension headaches or migraines are present in 50 to 70% of fibromyalgia patients. Headache symptoms are usually rated as severe, occur at least two times per week, and often have a migraine component. This head pain is partly due to trigger points in the shoulder, neck, and head muscles. I get thumping headaches daily and medication does very little, laying down in bed can be the only treatment

Balance Problems – Balance confidence is greatly reduced in people with fibromyalgia. Walking patterns are altered and the odds of falling are increased. I have feel a few times now, once I slipped and knocked myself out in the hall, woke up in Dunfermline Hospital, great fun! lol

Itchy/Burning Skin – Your skin may look normal or it may have itchy red bumps similar to hives. Burning pain, similar to a bad sunburn, is also common in fibromyalgia patients. I personally get ‘Burnt Skin Syndrome’ where it feels like you are in an oven

Other Strange Symptoms? – Do bright lights, sounds, or odours bother you? These symptoms could be part of your fibromyalgia. Learn more by reading our article, “Is Sensory Overload Part of Your Fibromyalgia?”

The reason I mention all this is because it seems the only time of the year any of us with Fibromyalgia or any kind of Chronic illness get approval from family is Christmas 😀 I don’t understand this. But overall we see people being nice to each other at Christmas. My oldest son was in the drive through at McDonalds yesterday and paid for the people in the car behind, about £5 or so but that is the ‘Spirit of Christmas’ When he told me I was so proud of him, that is EXACTLY what I brought Dean and Ryan up to be, decent young men, men who will notice others around them and know love and kindness

Now I don’t speak for myself I have a few Facebook groups I run and this one here for people with Chronic illnesses allows people to get help and it helps me. Knowing we are not alone helps greatly, I guess in any situation? https://www.facebook.com/groups/699321140156812/ I notice every Christmas people are smiling, opening doors for you, letting you drive out of a road or wherever. The spirit of Christmas is true there is no argument because come January everyone turns miserable again. During the festive period everyone is a saint but 2 weeks later we all go back to the grind and hatred starts again. I have always asked myself why can’t we all act like this all year? I know many through support groups in real life and online who find it impossible to be happy, some people are just sad and it’s an illness. It’s like a heroin addict, we jail them, why not help them? This is what I am getting at. We as a species have times when we help and show love and times where we all turn miserable, me included but to be fair I do try to laugh my way through life, we are here once so smile and live for God’s sake 😀

Anyway, hope you all had a brilliant Christmas and all my friends in the USA are having a good day. It is past 7pm here in Scotland now so nearly over. For West coast USA it’s just starting, in Australia it’s already boxing day at that side of the World. I will sit and smoke a cannabis joint tonight as it is the ONLY thing that takes my pain away for any amount to of time. And as this is ‘Taboo’ series why is it people can get blind drunk, hit others, spread STD’s, cause havoc in city centre’s all over the World, lead to partners fighting, society allows this, society says ‘This is ok’ Yet if a person say? Family see me type “I will smoke a cannabis joint” I will probably be judged. This is how backwards our World can be. Our World is truly one big ironic pantomime for sure

Here, a song that I hate and a statement from a movie 😀

Wham! – Last Christmas
Via MASmusik100 on You Tube

Keep the Change You Filthy Animal
Via r2k3982 on You Tube

Shaun

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Taboo Series – Suicide


suicide

By @ShaunyGibson – Used to be @ ShaunyNews

As part of my ‘Taboo’ series I am going to talk about things in life people don’t want to talk about. Suicide is something that has hit many of us, be it a family member or a friend. I had a VERY close family try it a few years back, the person was ok. They came to my house a few days later, we hugged and cried. I jokingly said “Stay away from medicine cabinet” and we laughed. Maybe this is just the Scottish way, I don’t know, I have never left this Island.

I asked  the person ‘Why’ The reply was not what I expected. They smiled at me and said “It felt right, I felt ok, I felt comforted by something” And that was hard to take. I expected a disturbed warped mind out of control for life. But no, the person never tried it again, for a time we all worried they would but over time we relaxed about it. When I say this person was close, it’s a person I have known from birth who I look to as Super Human, a person you just wouldn’t think would do this. I have lived through several suicides in my 41 years from family and friends and people I knew through people. And the question we have is ‘Why’ I hope the comment the person above gave me gives others peace of mind if they have lost someone to suicide. It seems to always be the people we NEVER would have thought would do this, that do it. The strongest people, the strongest willed people. Ever noticed this?

So how do we spot it? How do we acknowledge a person is suicidal? For me it is near impossible, people in my past and present who have committed suicide or tried were happy, they seemed fine, people always say this. But then we have people in Hospital to stop them taking their own life. People who just don’t see this World as a viable place to be any more. All I know is the hurt it leaves behind lasts a life time, but we get through it, we learn to understand a person’s state of mind. And we can say “They are at peace now” Many in religion will say “They go to hell” Well I don’t believe this at all, there is no proof hell exists, but there is proof love exists.

Many say ‘It’s the cowards way out’ I don’t know if I agree with that saying. Thinking about it must take the strongest will a human being can summoned up to do this deed. They must be so strong to go through with it. I often wonder when people do it is there regret. Maybe it was a cry for help gone wrong, they didn’t want to die, they wanted to tell the World something, their World

I have never tried to commit suicide but I was close twice and been there more times. This was when everything I had was taken from me due to disability, things just kept going, every day, week, year, even now I have lost a person so close to me, I have known since birth. I have lost that person due to MY DISABILITY, MY ISSUES, MY WAYS. I don’t sit and cry about it, see it takes two people to see there is a problem and two people to understand it needs fixed. Drugs an Alcohol sometimes play a part, this is something we all must understand also. Don’t PRESUME someone you love is ok, ASK!

Suicide is a huge Taboo and I guess it’s best it stays that way. But we all must look closer, we must pay attention more. Teachers in high Schools must help also, they must look. We must look at depressed family and friends and always ask “You ok?” We must also be ready to listen to people. If we stop and ask and that person is allowed to tell a story we may stop that person committing suicide. We all have a part to play in the most taboo subject there is. We must show love, we must care, we must try. But if it happens we can’t live in hurt, the person who left us made the decision, don’t regret for life, we all have reasons to keep living and moving forward. If we allow life to do so it will kick us to the floor and keep us there, so we fight, we stay strong, we at least try and most important WE TALK! Talk to people you KNOW that will listen to you, this is a must

Suicidal thoughts have left me now, I accepted my new reality, it is so sad many can’t. So please, if you look at someone now, tomorrow, whenever and you think “Could they?” Please talk to that person.

Trust me, you can help so please try.

Shaun x

.Via Dominik Bieda

depression and-suicidal quotes-tumblrdepression-and-suicidal-quotes-tumblr-flashtofitcom-prepare-shn8xszf

 

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Can we distinguish street drugs to prescribed drugs and alcohol?


what-are-drugs

 

By @ShaunyGibson – Used to be @ ShaunyNews

I am on prescribed drugs and have been now for 15+ years, I have as an older teenager, younger adult taken illegal drugs so I know both sides of the picture. One thing I can’t wrap my head around is Alcohol. Alcohol society allows, but look what Alcohol does to town centres every weekend, sexually transmitted diseases spread, fighting, men hitting woman, I truly have seen it all. I see Alcohol as the worst because it shows more and more destructive powers than any other drug be that drug bought in the street or given by your Dr, I know alcoholics who are doing damage to their bodies but hey, IT’S SOCIABLY ACCEPTABLE!! This is the taboo nature of this article

I know a ton of people who take drugs that you can buy from the street, I know a ton of people who take the EXACT same drug given from our Dr’s, so simply I ask, what is the difference? I am on 3 drugs for life through prescribed drugs, Dydracodine, Tramadol and Diazepam and a ton more less lethal cocktails. Now these are prescribed and I have tried several times to come off them all, I managed a few months once but the pain made the decision in the end for me taking them again. So I ask, can we point the finger at some old lady on Tramadol the same we point it at someone buying it on the street for the EXACT same reasons? See not all Drs give these drugs when needed to people so the person is forced to buy from the street. 

Unknown Alcoholic

Unknown Alcoholic

It’s a taboo debate close to my heart because in the end society will judge and some judge while taking the drugs themselves. I HATE taking these drugs but have zero choice, do you take drugs via your Dr without choice? Do you buy them on the street because of your Dr? Do you drink because of depression? This is a very taboo debate here and one I already know not many will want to debate, but I believe it is a debate grown adults can have with or without conflict of inherent interest 

The Taboo nature of all this is ironic in a way, we all do it, drink, take drugs from Dr or buy in the street, so what is right and wrong? I also hate to see people sit in silence and suffer. I did this for so long and now I am honest about what I have. I have a Dr who researches Chronic Pain so I am very much one of the lucky ones, but I don’t feel lucky, odd right? I think the biggest issue with ANY chronic illness is family acknowledging it, mine don’t, but please no tears or poor Shaun, this is a dogma millions suffer and for them is why I have this group here https://www.facebook.com/groups/699321140156812/, to hell with them, really I mean it, if they can’t understand I don’t have the mental strength for their games.

What is your displeasure?

What is your displeasure?

 

I had a very close family member ask me a few weeks back “What is Fibromyalgia” and I almost went off on one, I had told this person 100 times I had it so he was at the wind up, he wanted a reaction, but I am better than that. Are you?  See people are all too happy to judge until Pain, Depression, being an Alcoholic, buying drugs from the street comes their way. I know MANY who drink and are they Alcoholics? Well I don’t judge so I guess we leave that to society as usual to disguise what is right or wrong. The worse thing in all this is people suffer in silence. I have my partner, my 2 sons and my Dr, my Dad, THEY LISTEN! Nothing more, all I need is people to listen. What about you? You keep it all inside or do you need people to listen? I am talking to millions of people here. It is an outrage in the 21st Century that this is all still so Taboo, this is part of my ‘Taboo’ series I NEED to write about. I never judge people, how dare others judge me or others. We are not here to pre-judge others but sadly people do it. My own, hold, I have a family member who said “You never leave the house” and “You are always in bed” I JUST WANT TO SCREAM “I HAVE NO FECKING CHOICE” But I don’t because many of you will know stress = pain.  So I let it be. I have lost family, same as many I speak to in the World, and that is a crying shame, these sad people who judge, these cowards who try and gain a reaction from all of us, if you have a chronic illness I know these words make utter sense

For now…….

Cheers 

Shaun 

I have a video here, Russell Brand, talking drugs, he is a BRILLIANT man, spoken to him once, watch if you can

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UK Heroin Misery Of The ‘Trainspotting’ Generation


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By @ShaunyGibson – Used to be @ ShaunyNews

Trainspotting was a low budget movie made in my home town Edinburgh, Scotland. Written by a lad I have met through some football mates,Irvine WelshI knew some of the cast and it will go down as a cult movie for all of time. Ewan McGregor as Mark “Rent Boy” Renton, Ewen Bremner as Daniel “Spud” Murphy, Jonny Lee Miller as Simon “Sick Boy” Williamson, Robert Carlyle as Francis “Franco” Begbie and Kevin McKidd as Tommy MacKenzie. I have shared my story of my “Trainspotting youth” http://deliberatedonkey.wordpress.com/2013/07/02/murder-and-more-through-the-eyes-of-a-child/ in the hope kids don’t open that door or walk that path

A quote I know myself, you have to have lived 'THAT LIFE' to get it.

A quote I know myself, you have to have lived ‘THAT LIFE’ to get it. (PUFF = Life)

You will know Ewan McGregor from the new Star Wars series of movies, Ewan I have met many times before he got famous, he is from Dundee but spent much time in acting classes here in Edinburgh starring in a few movies, but this made him as an actor, a fame all of the above got in Hollywood, this movie just should not have made as many millions as it did. It cost £2,000,000 Million to make ($3,100,000 Million Dollars) At the box office it brought in a whopping £45,000,000 ($72,000,000) and millions in Video/DVD/Blue ray sales.

Scene from Trainspotting

Scene from Trainspotting, this was the movie, nothing to do with trains

This movie was about Heroin in a bad place in my city. Many said it glorified Heroin, for me it showed the dangers. I was part of the “Heroin Generation” and am NOT PROUD to say I dabbled in drugs I should not have. I am a grown man now with 4 kids, these days are gone. This movie for me was a wakeup call, interesting to know what it did for others.

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Trainspotting, Renton went cold turkey, just stopped

Heroin so dangerous that one hit and you are addicted there and then. Many people stupidly think if you smoke weed you will turn to Heroin. It’s like saying if you have one glass of wine you will end up an Alcoholic. A small % turn to Heroin, many never smoked weed. But society is backwards. Someone like me can’t smoke a joint to relax my pain, but people can get drunk, fight, drink every night and fight, kids can get drunk, go up town and fight, spread STD’s (Sexually Transmitted Diseases) Break windows and it costs tax makers a lot, some even, like me, are on hard drugs not through choice, but through necessity. We must define drugs and alcohol with logic before we cast stones

Begbie, we all know a "Begbie" Some said I was a "Begbie" I don't know

Begbie, we all know a “Begbie” Some said I was a “Begbie” I don’t know

THE FULL MOVIE TRAINSPOTTING>

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 NOW THE REALITY OF HEROIN! 

Pictures of Rachel Whitear's body were used in a drug education video. This is real, Rachel OD'd, over dosed

Pictures of Rachel Whitear’s body were used in a drug education video. This is real, Rachel OD’d, over dosed, she is a statistic now

Much of what you will read here is England and Wales, Scotland has the same sadly. The number of adults seeking treatment for heroin and crack cocaine addiction in England has more than doubled in 10 years, new figures have revealed. While the total number of heroin and crack cocaine addicts has fallen below 300,000 for the first time since estimates began, there is a generation still hooked – the so-called Trainspotting generation.

The disaffected, heroin-addicted young people immortalised in Irvine Welsh’s bestselling novel are getting older. More than a third of the total population of adults in treatment centres are aged 40 or over, according to Public Health England. Many started using heroin in the epidemics of the 1980s and 1990s when good-quality, cheap opiate flooded the inner cities.

Thankfully I hated needles. I used to hang with 20 mates, 2 of us are doing well, 3 in jail, rest are dead. My old friends

Thankfully I hated needles. I used to hang with 20 mates, 2 of us are doing well, 3 in jail, rest are dead. My old friends

But as they enter old age there are warnings that dwindling health and dependence on heroin could place an increased burden on the National Health Service. On the ageing generation of addicts, Louise Ford, deputy manager at the Smithfield Detox Centre in Manchester, told Sky News: “For many people of this age group there is a sense of ‘now or never’ in finally getting the treatment they need.

“For the over-40s it could be redundancy, bereavement or failing health that finally prompts them to come in for help. The treatment is not easy and many relapse.” For those who have not sought treatment, life is a cycle of “scoring” heroin and finding the money to pay for it. Homeless Paul, 42, has been taking heroin since he was 17-years-old. His partner Jill, 39, was introduced to the drug at the age of 14. They take heroin in the back streets of Manchester’s city centre.

"Chasing the dragon" No needle. Edinburgh was once Europe's Heroin capital, not any more

“Chasing the dragon” No needle. Edinburgh was once Europe’s Heroin capital, not any more

He said: “I had a good life, what you’d call an average life, a car, a flat. I got laid off last year. I had never been out of work before. “Now I wake up, go and score, go and take it, go and find a pitch and start raising money again to score again and that goes on and on. “If I don’t get help now I’ll still be doing this into my 50s and 60s and I don’t want that. Heroin just makes you feel bad when you don’t have it. It doesn’t make you feel good anymore.”

CHOOSE LIFE!

http://news.sky.com/story/1384034/heroin-misery-of-the-trainspotting-generation

http://web.orange.co.uk/article/news/drug_addiction_treatment_doubles_in_10_years

http://freshnews-uk.com/news/heroin-misery-of-the-trainspotting-generation-sky-news

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America – Why, When, Where did you become so dumb? Obama has played you all!


THIS MAN IS A LIAR, I HAVE PROOF, CHECK!

THIS MAN IS A LIAR, I HAVE PROOF, CHECK!

America, I have some amazing friends in all corners of your once great Country, I see an America that has been dumbed down so badly, let down so badly by a willing Government that has made you stupid. You were told this by MANY people from your own Country. I will keep the words short and show you 3 videos and some pictures and also some tweets that had me laughing so hard I broke 14 ribs 😀 America, I love you, you are a brilliant people, listen to George Carlin, watch the video of Obama. I AM WASTING MY TIME BECAUSE YOU ARE TOO DARN LAZY TO EDUCATE YOURSELF AMERICA. I AM TALKING TO MYSELF! I EXPECT NO DEBATE BECAUSE I DON’T THINK ANYONE IN AMERICA IS SMART ENOUGH TO FIGURE THIS OUT. When I debate American people I get deleted EVERY TIME because they can’t debate. My Country is in the top 3 of cleverest countries and we invented the modern World. Thank Scotland for giving you ALL THE STUFF YOU HAVE! Most of it is made in China but created in Scotland, this is true. I am just saying, this is how I notice your education system has failed you and your kids America, if you REALLY want to educate yourself, watch and read ….Please?

How the Scots Invented the Modern World

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scottish_inventions_and_discoveries

The Newsroom – America is not the greatest country in the world anymore…

The Reason Education Sucks – GEORGE CARLIN

Obama Lies Compilation – WAKE UP YOU SHEEPLE!

Young Hillary Clinton Supporters Struggle to Name Her Achievements – THIS IS STAGGERING! 

I REST MY CASE AMERICA, HOW CAN YOU CHANGE THIS? DO YOU KNOW HOW? 

HILARIOUS AMERICAN STUPID TWEETS! 

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WELL THIS IS A CRACKER TO START WITH!

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THIS FOOL WAS BEING SERIOUS

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THE RACE CARD, ALWAYS SIMMERING ON THE SURFACE

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THERE ARE NO GIRAFFE’S IN GHANA!! OMG!

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THIS JUST IS BACKWARDS AND HARD TO UNDERSTAND, DO YOU?

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YEAH, AMERICA WAS BORN WHEN JESUS WAS, WE ALL KNOW THIS (OMFG) WHERE IS HER SCHOOL?

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THE LESS SAID ABOUT THIS THE BETTER!

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NO COMMENT

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YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW HARD I LAUGHED

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AHH, LOOK, THE RACE ISSUE, WELL, KINDA

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THIS BROKE MY 14th RIB

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OH MY GOD! REALLY? I MEAN….Forget it!

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STUPID, DUMB, CRAZY MAYBE?

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AMERICAN – IT IS A LANGUAGE!!! (PMSL)

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SURELY THIS PERSON WAS HAVING A LAUGH. SADLY HE WASN’T, FOR REAL

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YES AMERICA, THERE ARE 7 COUNTRIES ON EARTH! WELL SPOTTED!!

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SIGH 😦 I FEEL SORRY FOR YOU GUYS

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RUDE AGAINST DISABLED PEOPLE, WELL NOT REALLY, ANYONE KNOW WHAT SHE WAS GOING FOR?

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I AM SORRY AMERICA, BUT THIS HAS TO BE SAID, SLATE ME, HATE ME, DELETE ME, BLOCK ME, I DON’T CARE. I HAVE FRIENDS THERE WHO AGREE WITH ME, THIS IS TRAGIC AND SAD AMERICA! AND IT KINDA GETS WORSE 😦

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HOW ONE OF THE UK’s MAIN NEWSPAPERS VIEWED THE 2nd ELECTION WIN FOR GWB

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Psychics, Spiritual People, Tarot Card, Ouija boards and all that stuff


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I just sat and watched Billy Connolly live in Adelaide Australia, I was crying with laughter, A-Typical Scottish humour, mocks everyone and anyone, brilliant he is. He hit on a subject I don’t really understand, it says it in the title “Psychics, Spiritual People, Tarot Card, Ouija boards and all that shit”

Now I am not going to mock people, well not too much but I think some people are real gullible. Having Fibromyalgia people offer you all the cures under the Sun. One person asked me to sit in the Beach surrounded by stones. I think she meant “Go to the beach stoned” High on Cannabis or something, maybe I picked her up wrong

People who claim to be Psychic kill me “I feel a Steven coming through” Someone will say “Margaret” The Psychic will say “OH AYE, IT’S MARGARET RIGHT ENOUGH” And I get my kill at that. I laugh hard. People use all kinds of things to heal or help and fair play to them but not for me. Anyone who has offered me such help in the past, really! Thanks a lot, but it doesn’t work. If it did Medical Science would have picked up on it

I have tried EVERYTHING with my disability, I won’t tell you what because you will laugh at me and talk about me 😀 Seriously I have tried some shit to conquer this disability it is untrue. Naive I think I was but when you are in pain you will try most things. When people say “I feel a certain energy between us” PUNCH THEM IN THE TEETH, they want to shag you! Say to them “Yeah I can see that certain energy in your underwear moving around”

There is a show in the UK called Most Haunted, they are armed to the teeth with equipment, heat pads, cameras, night time cameras, see in the fog cameras, gamma ray cameras, heat seeking cameras, head seeking missiles, you get the story. They have it all, apart from a Ghost! And I will tell you why, BECAUSE THERE IS NOT SUCH A THING! I hope when I die Heaven is real but there is no proof, only blind faith and a book, in my opinion, all it is, don’t take it personal and cry for the love of God I am just talking out loud here. Ouija board are a lot of crap too, someone is pushing the thing without knowing, it’s been kinda proven

Tarot Card I get a good laugh at. I had a ‘Reading once’ and some of the cards were just fecking ridiculous, the hangman, the 2 of kicked to death in an ally way, the 4 of stabbed in the face and the 9 of shot in the bum, you get the drift. For people that make a living out of this, fair play, who am I to judge right?

Then you have religion. Now I kind off believe in God but not in a traditional way, I believe there is something, but I am going to no Church to give money and buying no books. My way works for me and I am a happy person, if you read down a blog you will see why. I think as a species we have too much spare time many of us. Some are really unlucky and were born into War or Poverty then there are the rich people or people with a few quid, enough to get by you know. I just did a bit of looking there, I did a search for “Psychics in Edinburgh” There was over 300 fecking people. How can you make a living from this? I mean there is no proof of an afterlife, nobody has came back to tell us. It, like religion needs faith.

Sadly I have a sense of humour and find it real hard to take it as real, you?

😀 Here is what I just watched, if you want to laugh for a few hours, please, give Billy a watch, you will laugh hard 😀

FULL DVD Via Billy Connolly, 2008