Music mix Christmas : Silent Night


SILENT NIGHT Silent night, holy night!All is calm, all is brightRound yon Virgin, Mother, and ChildHoly Infant so tender and mildSleep in heavenly peaceSleep in heavenly peace [Verse 2]Silent night, holy night!Shepherds quake at the sightGlories stream from heaven afarHeavenly hosts sing ‘Alleluia!Christ the Savior is bornChrist the Savior is born [Verse 3]Silent night, holy […]

Music mix Christmas : Silent Night

Taboo: Pain, Love, Cowards, Hate and the Festive Period


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By @ShaunyGibson – Used to be @ ShaunyNews

When an artist has a stage to speak to thousands of people they often use it well, I am lucky enough to have such a stage to share my art. Writing is an art and so is music, so read on. I am sitting at 3am here after 5 days of early bed and up early to being up all night on my own. Fibro is killing me. My skin is burning, my ankles and hips feel broken, my back feels snapped, back of my neck and shoulders are gone I can’t turn my head. I can’t type a lot, need to stop typing. Volterol Gel and I have a relationship but I don’t think I will meet its parents over Christmas.

Funny I say that there are a few families I didn’t and won’t see over Christmas. Does it hurt? Not at all, I am used to it. I changed when Fibro changed me. The images I have added to this article were not done by me, I don’t know who to give credit to but they are telling the story I try and tell, same as the song below

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Why?

I live an existence of loneliness. I have no need to feel lonely but Fibro makes my rules also the rules of anyone with Fibro. At this time of the year the last thing people with a Chronic Illness need is stress. See stress makes me angry and makes me sore. See the Shaun everyone knew when I was 25/30 years old is gone and put in his place is a man lost in a World where getting lost is real hard, I say that because often I want to vanish for a time, maybe be a fly on a wall somewhere. I smell rats very easy, I guess when we lose one sense we are given another, just something I have noticed on my travels as I get older

Often I think about just getting in my car and seeing what else life has to offer me, but I know I will come right back here to the people I love. I have not tried this ‘yet’ but I would be wasting my time right? If you read this and have Chronic pain life Fibro you will understand every word. Every word, sentence and paragraph will make sense. I am due medication so I am typing with free will. The thought of a new World scares me, the thought of dating scares me more. I have never lost in love nor asked a woman out as an adult, but something keeps asking me if I should try, anyway………..

Sadly the people we need to understand make our lives worse. They don’t mean it, in-fact they are blissfully unaware of what they do to us. I don’t hold a candle to anyone and judge it’s not my way. But are there days I feel like I want to escape this pain? Sadly yes, in a bad way, but I can’t do that, the pain would allow it in a heartbeat however so I ignore the pain. I know many who are like me, in agony, alone, sad, depressed, I am just agony with the odd visit from Sad, Alone and Depressed and have no other choices, the choice I have ends my pain and brings pain to others. We don’t get choice we get what is on offer every day. My reality on paper is good but in reality it annoys me. The dysfunctional nature of what I call family has been a constant but I am not alone, I don’t think we all need a Disability to feel the way I do. Lately I have become distant with a woman I thought I would never be distant with. She says things that hurt me, she speaks to others, surely knowing I get to hear about it and I do. When people are unhappy they tend to look past the love in front of them and seek it elsewhere, I do understand this, although I don’t agree with the principle. I believe talking cures all, be it good or bad, when we talk things happen, when we don’t talk bad things happen. So I hope talking starts soon, I am nobody’s fool, not even the one woman in my life I would be a fool for, I won’t be a convenient bank for nobody apart from my kids

Eminem Sing for the Moment – Lyrics
Via hahaudied7 on You Tube

 

At this time of the year I see images of my family having fun and it kills me, it’s a knife through the heart. I get angry with Fibro but I only get angry with myself and that is pointless. So do we give up? HELL NO. The last thing I would do is give the people who would like to see me fall, actually fall, I fight against the people who wish to see me down and beat up. There are not many, certain people should know better. The silence and cowardly acts say it all for me. People saying things to my friends who do tell me. Cowards who would fill their underwear should I stand before them. People who believe you can sit in safety behind a keyboard, annoy people like, say? Me and my friends, maybe family. That Cowards day is coming unless they understand the rule of life in Scotland

LET IT GO

LET IT GO

I have family and friends, some of my friends are hardened lads who keep me going forward, kick my back side when it needs kicked and I thank them for it, without it I would spiral into deep depression and this wouldn’t be a blog, it would be the last letter I ever write. I refuse to give these sad people the smile on their faces they so need from me. I will beat you, I will outlast you and I may even be behind you one day when you turn around, I truly hope you are understanding my language here because I hate trouble, I am too old and sore to care, but I won’t be a fool for anyone, yeah, I made this clear I hope

My reason for fighting on. Want to challenge me and them 2? Come, bring it, don't be no coward

My reason for fighting on. Want to challenge me and them 2? Come, bring it, don’t be no coward

Anyone to even tries to put a wedge between me and my girls will lose badly. I hope the right person reads this. I know this is a News Page on Ace News but this is news, it’s my news, it’s news I share with hundreds more, many are going through family and friend issues, so I share mine so people know they ain’t alone, people think I share too much, truly I have not. Fibro and it’s medication is a reality that makes you question so we must be sure before we get angry that we are onto the right reality. The old Shaun who did the bad stuff 19 years ago is always on my shoulder telling me if I return to my old ways the pain will leave me, after all the pain arrived the day I promised to behave, truly it did, it tempts me like the drugs I take to help my pain, it taunts me like a person hating you. I refuse to go back, but rest assured, should I go back I won’t be back here. I don’t think I can do this however, them two Princess’s above make me go on. I can’t let them down, I can’t give in to hatred of people who laugh at my ill’s. But then again I do have a phone. I write this to stop me doing the stupid thing here. So it’s off my shoulders and I smile and move forward. The old Shaun must remain silent, he can’t be allowed to run me….

…I can’t do that

~~
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~~

Taboo Series: Disability, being alone and this ‘Spirit of Christmas’ issue


 

christmas-tis-the-season-jolly-facebook-timeline-coverBy @ShaunyGibson – Used to be @ ShaunyNews

I know, I know, It’s Christmas and I probably should be on my sofa chilled out with a beer after Christmas dinner. Well sadly I can’t because of pain and all that amazing Jazz plus I don’t drink. What I suffer from is Fibromyalgia and ‘Fibro’ doesn’t know Christmas day from Pancake day it just keeps giving pain that is unbearable, the effects of Parkinson Disease and also Motor Neuron Disease and other really harsh disabilities like MS and ME and more. So for me I loved the day, loved to see my kids open presents and be with my Son, his partner and my Partner with my oldest son coming late with his partner

Fibromyalgia makes this time of the year almost impossible for people with made up invisible not hurting disabilities, disabilities that people in your life know more about than your Dr, I say that as it’s what society tells us, I find it strange that you often have to be in a wheelchair before someone will understand why you can’t visit them, I know people are dying, I know people who have died and people who have lost so this is where my own personal guilt comes into play, but as I am told by almost everyone, don’t think this way. Here are our symptoms: http://www.fmnetnews.com/fibro-basics/symptoms

Pain All Over – People describe fibromyalgia pain as deep muscular aching, throbbing, shooting, stabbing, or intense burning. Muscle groups used the most may hurt more. In addition, the severity of regional pains can make your fibromyalgia symptoms worse. The pain is unimaginable if you don’t suffer Fibro. This is the part that many can’t live with and we see suicide happen. The pain is very hard to describe, the best I can do is ‘All over toothache’ others have other ways of explaining the pain, for me all over toothache pain is what I feel. I feel like I have JUST broken several bones or snapped muscles, but it is only all day every day 😀 so it’s cool really. Many stay depressed and suicidal, I have been there and back, lost friends and family over it, all this  b@stard illness does is take from us all. 3% of the World’s 7 Billion populous suffer from Fibro. In the UK we grade it 1 to 10. Many are 2/3 just having pain in one area, I was 10 and left the pain clinic as it was pointless but I still help the pain team with sitting and speaking to Dr’s and Pain experts from all over the World at the Ashley Ainsley Hospital in Edinburgh, it has a few large halls that sit a few hundred or more. So although I suffer I spend more time helping others. It’s the old adage “To help others is to help yourself”

Fatigue – Exhaustion can be one of the most incapacitating fibromyalgia symptoms. You may feel as though your arms and legs are weighted down by concrete blocks and your body may be so drained of energy that every task requires great effort. I can be wide awake then *PING* Sleeping or sleepy. Heavy dry eyes, can happen an hour or 2 after a good sleep or at night. So too much sleep and not enough sleep. A pain it is, waking early and sleeping early is all our goals but if we are in agony and it’s 3am we have to just deal with it. For me this is the most annoying probably. I think if I fix this (Like now) for good I will live better. But I am at the mercy of Fibro

Sleep Difficulties – It’s not just about falling asleep. Repeat arousals prevent you from reaching deep, restorative sleep, so you wake up feeling as though you have been hit by a Mack truck. An overnight sleep study may show symptoms of repeat arousals, but a specific sleep disorder may not be found. For the past 5 nights I have been asleep early and up early, BRILLIANT!!! Before and I am sure it will come back I am up a day, down a day, I am missing half my life sleeping. That hurts when you miss family as I do. This is the single most difficult one that none of our families can understand and all we really try to get them to get.

Brain Fog – Trouble concentrating, retaining new information, and word-finding are common fibromyalgia symptoms that seriously interfere with daily functioning. You may be easily distracted and this symptom appears to correspond to the severity of pain (as though the brain is consumed by the pain, limiting your ability to perform cognitive tasks). This is the Parkinson Disease area of the disease. I can be talking and half way through talking *GONE* 😀 What I was talking about just vanishes, with friends/family it’s ok as they remind me, with strangers it’s embarrassing and I don’t like that bit. I tend to just not talk much now to strangers unless it’s email or type chat. Just makes it easier. This is the one thing (Pain aside) we all hate, I have to leave notes on my PC/Laptop/Phone etc for things like “Go to the toilet” or “Take Medication”

Morning Stiffness (Now Now 😀) – You may wake up to enhanced muscle soreness with fibromyalgia, but you probably also feel more stiff than usual. The cause of these muscle symptoms is unknown, but warm water and gentle stretching usually help alleviate them. I can’t move much for an hour after awakening. Often I need a cup of tea and medication before I can go about my day. Sometimes I just have to get up and walk like I am made of cardboard in agony. Also amazing fun, lol

Muscle Knots, Cramping, Weakness – No matter how much you try to relax your muscles, they may feel tense. Many contain rope-like knots called my ofascial trigger points, making you more susceptible to muscle cramping and weakness.The pain of fibromyalgia may also be a source of muscle weakness. These are very similar to Motor Neuron Disease, I get this 24/7, my hamstrings, calf muscles are worse but anywhere we have muscles/tendons etc sufferer friends and I get pain a if there has been a partial tear in any given area, go to the hospital, get a scan, all good. Very hard to diagnose us, but they hooked me up to electrical nodes and made pain happen by pulling and pushing my muscles all over, it showed increased pain activity so proving the pain was there

Digestive Disorders – Constipation, diarrhoea, abdominal pain, gas and bloating, irritable bowel, and nausea are found in roughly 40 to 70% of fibromyalgia patients. Acid reflux and a slowed digestion are also common. If you take strong pain killers it’s important to take anti-acid tablets or you will ruin your insides badly.

Headaches/Migraines – Recurrent tension headaches or migraines are present in 50 to 70% of fibromyalgia patients. Headache symptoms are usually rated as severe, occur at least two times per week, and often have a migraine component. This head pain is partly due to trigger points in the shoulder, neck, and head muscles. I get thumping headaches daily and medication does very little, laying down in bed can be the only treatment

Balance Problems – Balance confidence is greatly reduced in people with fibromyalgia. Walking patterns are altered and the odds of falling are increased. I have feel a few times now, once I slipped and knocked myself out in the hall, woke up in Dunfermline Hospital, great fun! lol

Itchy/Burning Skin – Your skin may look normal or it may have itchy red bumps similar to hives. Burning pain, similar to a bad sunburn, is also common in fibromyalgia patients. I personally get ‘Burnt Skin Syndrome’ where it feels like you are in an oven

Other Strange Symptoms? – Do bright lights, sounds, or odours bother you? These symptoms could be part of your fibromyalgia. Learn more by reading our article, “Is Sensory Overload Part of Your Fibromyalgia?”

The reason I mention all this is because it seems the only time of the year any of us with Fibromyalgia or any kind of Chronic illness get approval from family is Christmas 😀 I don’t understand this. But overall we see people being nice to each other at Christmas. My oldest son was in the drive through at McDonalds yesterday and paid for the people in the car behind, about £5 or so but that is the ‘Spirit of Christmas’ When he told me I was so proud of him, that is EXACTLY what I brought Dean and Ryan up to be, decent young men, men who will notice others around them and know love and kindness

Now I don’t speak for myself I have a few Facebook groups I run and this one here for people with Chronic illnesses allows people to get help and it helps me. Knowing we are not alone helps greatly, I guess in any situation? https://www.facebook.com/groups/699321140156812/ I notice every Christmas people are smiling, opening doors for you, letting you drive out of a road or wherever. The spirit of Christmas is true there is no argument because come January everyone turns miserable again. During the festive period everyone is a saint but 2 weeks later we all go back to the grind and hatred starts again. I have always asked myself why can’t we all act like this all year? I know many through support groups in real life and online who find it impossible to be happy, some people are just sad and it’s an illness. It’s like a heroin addict, we jail them, why not help them? This is what I am getting at. We as a species have times when we help and show love and times where we all turn miserable, me included but to be fair I do try to laugh my way through life, we are here once so smile and live for God’s sake 😀

Anyway, hope you all had a brilliant Christmas and all my friends in the USA are having a good day. It is past 7pm here in Scotland now so nearly over. For West coast USA it’s just starting, in Australia it’s already boxing day at that side of the World. I will sit and smoke a cannabis joint tonight as it is the ONLY thing that takes my pain away for any amount to of time. And as this is ‘Taboo’ series why is it people can get blind drunk, hit others, spread STD’s, cause havoc in city centre’s all over the World, lead to partners fighting, society allows this, society says ‘This is ok’ Yet if a person say? Family see me type “I will smoke a cannabis joint” I will probably be judged. This is how backwards our World can be. Our World is truly one big ironic pantomime for sure

Here, a song that I hate and a statement from a movie 😀

Wham! – Last Christmas
Via MASmusik100 on You Tube

Keep the Change You Filthy Animal
Via r2k3982 on You Tube

Shaun

~~

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~~

LIVE UP TO THE SECONDS UPDATES FROM THE GLASGOW DISASTER TODAY


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 @ShaunyGibson – Used to be @ ShaunyNews Via http://news.sky.com/

The link below is a live video stream from Sky News with images, comments and more below the video, it updates up to the second. I am hearing a baby in a buggy was hit. I am PRAYING HARD this is wrong. 6 Dead and 7 hurt badly we know so far. This is so tragic. Police have rules out a Terrorist Attack. It ‘Seems’ the Lorry driver had a heart attack but that is speculation. All the latest is below. This is the same city that had a Helicopter fall into a pub same time last year. Again the link below has all the numbers for worried relatives and friends and interviews from people who were there. Hundreds were there. The Garbage truck was said to be doing 70Mph. One guy said the lorry was hitting people like pins on a bowling green. One thing I do know is Scottish people come together, Glasgow is a very strong city. My heart is with Glasgow tonight and for the people who we lost, my kin, I shed a tear. The families I can only imagine the pain. The 7 injured people I pray are ok. The grief will be with us for a while.

A TAXI FIRM HAVE OFFERED FREE TAXI SERVICE FOR ANYONE AFFECTED TONIGHT

The Scottish spirit shines through

The Scottish spirit shines through

LINK BELOW IS UP TO THE SECOND REPORTING

http://news.sky.com/story/1396284/lorry-crash-live-updates-noise-and-bangs

Sky News Live

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Glasgow Square to the right. The lorry is between 2 buildings

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Police tend to people in trauma

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One can only imagine. These guys are so brave. I am PRAYING there is no baby in a pram there.

~~

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~~

(BREAKING) Glasgow Scotland: Bin Lorry Crashes Into Shoppers: Six Dead (Live Video)


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 @ShaunyGibson – Used to be @ ShaunyNews Via http://news.sky.com/

I am hearing 2 kids and a baby, this is speculation in Twitter but people there are tweeting this. PLEASE BE WRONG!! Me and Dawn are in tears here, we are worried we have family there. This is George Square. Christmas for gods sake!!! Almost a YEAR TO THE DAY When the Helicopter fell on the pub killing my kin. I can’t believe what I am watching and hearing. Please God no babies… This is the biggest shopping centre in Scotland. Anyone with worry about a relative or loved one, call Police Scotland: 01786289070 There will be shoppers from all over the Northern part of Britain there

A bin lorry has smashed into a crowd of Christmas shoppers in Glasgow city centre, killing six people. The number of people injured in the accident is believed to be in double figures. The crowd were waiting to cross the road outside Queen Street station by the Millennium Hotel in the centre of the city and some people are thought to have been thrown up to 15 metres from the site of impact.  As many as six ambulances are at the scene, along with the police and fire service and pictures on social media show people being treated along the length of the street.

Sky News Live

A woman who witnessed the entire event told Sky News: “The only way the lorry stopped was actually hitting the building.” Sky correspondent James Matthews who is at the scene asked the witness to tell him about the people on the pavement who had been hit

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The distressed woman said: “I can’t, honestly I just can’t do that.” She went on to say: “When something is coming up behind them like that, how can they run out of the way? It’s such a horrific thing. There was noise and bangs and screams. “There was a baby in a buggy. There were actually two little kids. It was just horrific.” Sky’s James Matthews said: “There is no structural damage to the hotel. This is bang in the middle of Glasgow’s shopping area.

“The lorry collided with pedestrians before ramming into the hotel.” Police have declared the scene a major incident. A statement released by Police Scotland said: “About 2.30pm today, a Glasgow City Council bin lorry was travelling north on Queen Street when it appeared to strike pedestrians outside the Gallery of Modern Art. “It continued to travel towards George Square, when it crashed at the Millennium Hotel on Queen Street at George Square. “There have been a number of fatalities and people injured. Emergency services are currently at the scene.”

Bin lorry crash

Police say the lorry travelled 300 metres from the moment of initial impact until it stopped. Lauren Gilmore, a shopper in George Square, said: “Just over a year ago, we had another tragedy in Glasgow – it was the helicopter crash. And now this has happened again just before Christmas.” Witness Connor Gillies a reporter with Radio Clyde told Sky News that the whole of Queen Street has been cordoned off and emergency services are arriving by the minute. Describing the scene on Twitter, Brett Molloy tweeted: “Christ something major has kicked off at Queen St.”

“Whole of George square is shut off, bodies on the road. Scary man. Horrible, horrible scenes. Even worse at this time of the year. City centre is an eerie, eerie place right now.” The Scottish Fire Service tweeted: “Firefighters are in attendance at a serious incident in Queen Street, Glasgow. Our crews are working alongside other emergency responders.” Janey Godley tweeted: “Utter horrific carnage people on ground getting triage street poles smashed into pavement emergency services all over it. “Local shop keeper says bin lorry and taxi involved & lorry mounted pavement #georgessquare

“I was at G square in immediate aftermath it’s not something I ever want to see again – wandered in with music on before tape went up.” Prime Minister David Cameron said: “I’m being kept fully briefed on the major incident in Glasgow. My thoughts are with the families of those involved and the emergency services.”Labour leader Ed Miliband said: “Terrible news from Glasgow – my thoughts are with all those affected by this horrific accident.” Allan Docherty, manager of a nearby JD Wetherspoon pub says police have emptied the premises ahead of potentially using it as a meeting place for families and friends of victims.

Scottish Labour leader Jim Murphy tweeted: “There is a major incident in Glasgow’s George Square. Multiple emergency services on the scene. Thoughts & prayers with everyone injured.”

Police have advised anyone who is in the centre of Glasgow this afternoon to contact friends or relatives to tell them they’re safe.

~~

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~~

Christmas has been destroyed by ‘Consumerism’


 

Santa-SpendChristmas or Christmas Day (Old English: Crīstesmæsse, meaning “Christ’s Mass”) is an annual festival commemorating the birth of Jesus Christ,observed generally on December 25 as a religious and cultural celebration among billions of people around the world. A feast central to the Christian liturgical year, it closes the Advent season and initiates the twelve days of Christmastide, which ends after the twelfth night. Christmas is a public holiday in many of the world’s nations, is celebrated culturally by a large number of non-Christian people, and is an integral part of the Christmas and holiday season.While the birth year of Jesus is estimated among modern historians to have been between 7 and 2 BC, the exact month and day of his birth are unknown, and are not the focus of the Church’s Christmas celebration. His birth is mentioned in two of the four canonical gospels. By the early-to-mid 4th century, the Western Christian Church had placed Christmas on December 25, a date later adopted in the East, although some churches celebrate on the December 25 of the older Julian calendar, which, in the Gregorian calendar, currently corresponds to January 7, the day after the Western Christian Church celebrates the Epiphany. In the Council of Tours of 567, the Church “declared the twelve days between Christmas and Epiphany to be one unified festal cycle”, thus giving significance to both December 25 and January 6. The date of Christmas may have initially been chosen to correspond with the day exactly nine months after early Christians believed Jesus to have been conceived, or with one or more ancient polytheistic festivals that occurred near southern solstice (i.e., the Roman winter solstice); a further solar connection has been suggested because of a biblical verse [a] identifying Jesus as the “Sun of righteousness” This is according to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christmas

How Consumerism Stole Christmas – People being asked what Christmas means in 1 word
Via nimtye on You Tube

https://acenewsdesk.wordpress.com/2014/12/02/the-best-slave-is-a-slave-that-doesnt-know-hes-a-slave/

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How True

That above is an article I did to show the true nature of 21st Century Earth when it comes to ideology. Sadly that link above telling the true nature of Christmas is long gone and has been replaced by Consumerism, something I have written about a lot in many blogs. The true nature of Christmas these days in the 1st World is “What do you want” I know nobody who celebrates Christmas for its real reasons, in-fact maybe an Uncle and Aunt.

See we no longer as a species Worldwide celebrate Christmas for the real reasons, watch TV just now, especially kids TV and you will see it. I am sitting here at just past 10am on a cold Scottish morning with one of the Disney Channels on as my youngest Daughter is off Nursery with a cold. She is flicking through the 23 Kids channels that Sky TV brings here in the UK and every time she went to a channel on the TV it was an advert, after each advert she said “Daddy I want that from Santa” I replied “Well Santa is watching you have to be good honey” And she went back to watching ‘Sheriff Callie’s Wild West’

Most shops today and till the 24th

Most shops today and till the 24th

 

So who is wrong here? Society? Religion for pushing people away? Parenting? The shops?  TV Land? Well pick one, we will all have a different reason as to why the real reason for Christmas has been lost by the vast majority in the developed World. We get channels on Sky TV from Australia, Russia, USA, South Africa, basically all over the World and on all channels I see adverts selling things to kids. My Daughters are 4 and 5 they believe in Santa and I think it is important we allow our kids to believe in the MAGIC of childhood wonderment as long as possible, I am acutely aware they are one person away from having their belief system ruined

This is so true

This is so true

So Dear Reader, do you agree? Disagree? Have another point? Let me know here. I am simply asking “What is Christmas in 2014” I have never myself as a kid or adult celebrated Christmas for the reasons it started in the first place. I can’t blame my parents, they got an Orange for Christmas, the dynamics have changed. Some spend thousands of pounds on crap that will be throw away before next Christmas to make way for the new crap. It is a circle of Consumerism

Shauny

~~
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~~

Down syndrome and dog video, WOW – A Dog is for life – Not just Christmas


 

DogBy @ShaunyGibson – Used to be @ ShaunyNews

Guess it’s that time of the year we try to get the message to people, well it is the title. This happens globally, people giving kids pets only for the fun period to wear off. Dogs for me are amazing creatures, they sure have more love in them than most of us Humans, they want and ask for nothing, they expect love, the same love we should be giving them. Sadly this is not always the story, the cat and dog homes prove this. We got Lisha, our dog who is much a part of the family as could be from Edinburgh Cat and Dog Home, she was a rescued dog. So I am just saying, love your pets, don’t impulse buy a pet folks, please if you do, make that pet a priority.

I have a video below that almost made me cry. The video is of a young amazing boy who has Down syndrome, I ask you watch this video and not be touched in your heart. I found this video a while back and have blogged it before, I guess at this time of the year we need to press home the message that we must look after our pets all year, not just January

Enjoy the most touching video I have seen in a long time, it is just amazing the love the dog displays. You got a pet? You will love this video…

Via Jim Stenson on You Tube (Credit goes to Jim 100% for this video)

Was that not something huh? x

Cats and dogs meeting babies for the first time – Cute animal compilation

Via Tiger Productions on You Tube

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