A Message To The World, My World


562440_10150895213902350_526362349_9771703_625620720_nBy @ShaunyGibson Used to be @ ShaunyNews This is a news page but below I have tagged in ‘AceNews Personal Stories’ I am a writer now, sports reporter, published columnist and freelance Journalist in the making and moulding.  So here goes. “Shaun, you have changed” is what I hear a lot these days. I am not special in the sense I am above anyone, nor am I below anyone, I am changing, events in my life have brought me here, free will, my choice, I lost people but in reality, they lost, how can I lose someone who didn’t like me? 😀 See the irony? I have reached a place many won’t or can’t. The power of the love I feel today and yesterday and as day turns to night then day again, perpetual motion makes it stronger. I feel alone in the sense I am being taken on a journey of love and enlightenment. I have yielded temptation and turned to the opposite, However, for tempted meaning enticed or attracted, the opposite effect could be repulsion. For the adjective tempted, there is the opposite un-tempted, or even discouraged, so I am going with ‘Self Control’ I am in a place now many don’t get but I don’t expect anyone to get it. I do however hope the 5 special girls in my life try and understand. 3 are adults 2 are my Daughters both below 5 years old, they will love me as Daddy no matter

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When you change and there can be many reasons for change, I won’t bore you with my reasons for change, let’s just say 2 things changed me, one is pain the other is medication. I am at the mercy of feelings I have no control over. Let’s just say I know who and why people tell me ‘I have changed’ I get it because I am that change, I became that change. My Editor Ian, my boss, he has helped me more than he knows, he is a very wise man and he has my back as I have his

When I was younger I so wanted to be a singer, I tried to learn the guitar so many times now my guitar has moved house and settled with a new family. Yeah we can still have a little fun, I wanted a stage, I needed to tell my story and I will. I am not a guy who will be mean to a woman yet I am made to feel this way, not by a person, by myself, but am I? I feel both, what is right? what is wrong? The answer is irrelevant because come judgement day none of this matters, but we don’t stop living knowing redemption day is coming, no, we live, breath, smile, talk, love and try and care, life is too short to be like this with each other, this is what I mean

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I live in a World now I feel so disconnected to I find it hard to define this World. We look and see evil all around us, yet individual acts of love and kindness exist should we choose them. Yeah, 1387537342we have choice, sadly many make choice out of not fear, but through the thoughts of others. I could say “Keeping up with the Joneses” but I would be wrong, yet close, people afraid to live and free themselves because a friend or loved one will judge, is that right? Are we to live worried and look to others for reactions to our actions? I don’t, I stopped being that guy. I became what I was indented to be. So I ask what stops you? Whoever you are, wherever you are. I asked for a stage once not long ago and I had 1,000,000 people, kind people, read what I write, that blew me away. In an instant I changed but the change is still happening.

When we lose we get something back in return. I will try layman’s terms more so for myself, your house gets broken into, you lose everything you have, but wait, your insurance gives you it all back, so in the end when we lose we gain something. I lost with the brutality of Satan himself but refused to bow at his knees, I took another path that has led me here, taken me to this spot in life, I will change more so YOU have the decision to make, not me. I talk to anyone I know or who knows me. I will go right ahead and change into what I am changing to, I don’t mean to hurt you, I could never do this, you said I changed, you were right.

1095045_10100432982666443_425973773_nPlease don’t deny me the change you don’t understand. I am love now. I left behind criminal life, I left behind idiots wanting to be the ‘The big guy’ This is not my place in life no more. I spoke with a well known guy a while back, he changed also. He said “Same tree, different leaves” and he was right

This, none of this is about me, it’s about ‘US’ and always will be. You are on your path, I am on mine, maybe one day our paths will meet instead of being parallel to each others.

I have my stage now, I have the audience I craved to tell my story. I am halfway through writing a book but have to change it often because the change in me is so fast and drastic, but it will be written in a way where I hurt nobody.

I live a life where as long as I know what I have done is correct, then I am happy. I have 2 little girls to help grow up and teach the same way I did with my two sons, they are amazing kids so my partner and I did good, now we must take these same values and bring two little girls up in a World where hatred, gossip, idle talk and more are the order of the day. My Job now as ‘Daddy’ are to make two wee girls understand choice is always there for them, then like their big brothers choice will be theirs to make, until that moment, we will help these two bundles of love grow. To you special 5 girls in my life, I love you for what you are not who you are, I love you, just you, I don’t pick and choose what to like or not like about you, I could but if I do I become someone else, see we have choices, love, smile, happy, yet often we, me included get lost in the middle of love and hate, many are stuck there for life, I am walking towards love and I don’t have a care in the world who judges me for choosing to be me 🙂 That is human instinct, I decided to leave that be, so can you. Just live and love and you will see a different world, a world I can see now, I am 41 now, not 21, I see through a man’s eyes but never looking back to talk to a confused kid who moulded me into the man I am today, why should I? He helped me get to this exact stage of my life and I love it, do you? x

Bryan Adams – Straight From The Heart
Via Bryan Adams on You Tube

 

Yesterday is gone…Let it go, leave it be, you can do nothing…
Today, if you smile, life is good….
For tomorrow we plant seeds today and hope they grow as we intend

Life REALLY is that easy, trust me

Shaun

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Defining life in a confusing World


Little Shaun, me, Isle of Skye, I was maybe 10 years old, I don't know

Little Shaun, me, Isle of Skye, I was maybe 10 years old, I don’t know

By @ShaunyGibson – Used to be @ShaunyNews

A question I always ask myself is ‘Why’ This could apply to any given situation through my history, my life or Earth’s history. As many know I love to research but I also love to research how far my own feelings define me as a 41 year old lad from Scotland. See my life was never easy but I felt it was. It is very hard to explain. Where there should have been hurt, pain and more, there was not. I sometimes challenged myself to have feelings and all along I did, I just denied myself ‘Feelings’
I told my story once and I will share it here. The reason for this article being about me and not news is because I really do hope I can get more friends, understand people better and understand our World better. The link below I did (Thanks Mel x) on Deliberate Donkay. A family member replied in the comments, kinds odd I thought at the time, the feel of the reply, but it made it more real a person in my history replying.
This is my story: http://deliberatedonkey.wordpress.com/2013/07/02/murder-and-more-through-the-eyes-of-a-child/
I grew up in a bad place, a bad area of town I now know to be bad, at the time I thought was heaven, at the time being a kid, I knew no better, it was my existence. Not until you walk away from something do we see it for what it is, not what we hoped or thought. I am called a ‘Writer’ these days but don’t see myself as such. People in my life will say ‘Oh Shaun you are a writer now’ In an instant I think ‘No I am not’ But I guess I am in some form. Had someone told me I was doing this at this moment in time in my life 20 years ago I would have done a bad deed. This was my life for a long time. I had a dysfunctional family, we were loved but hurt was always there, I guess young Shaun to the left in that boat refused to see or feel the hurt.

Little Shaun is circled in red bottom left, this was 'Family'

Little Shaun is circled in red bottom left, this was ‘Family’

This is ‘Ace News Services’ and I know many will be thinking “This isn’t news” Well let me explain this. Why I write this today. I want to help Ace News become global, this is my Editors design and I follow his lead, it’s why I closed ‘Shauny News’ with almost 1,000,000 (1 Million) hits in 5 months. See I never cared for ‘Well done’ or ‘Congratulations’ I guess I hate flattery. I have asked many times why this is and I always come back to the answer ‘Other people helped’ and this is true. If you are reading and you write also then isn’t what you write inspired by others? It is never about numbers of for me, it’s about quality. Quality over quantity. But for people to understand why I write as I do, I must share why I came to be today.
I am disabled now, yes I know, ‘Boo Hoo’ So I have time to sit and think and I am not my best company. What I mean is I get bored being alone, I am not good company for myself. Over time I found a source of company that many call ‘God’ and that is my source of not being alone. Many will go to Church or Read the bible or both, me? not yet I say. I have a relationship with God. I told my Mum the other day in a text, I don’t know if she believes me but I can only be me. The past can keep a person trapped in the past without them knowing or understanding. I let the past go, today I laugh, Smile and love life. Only when I am around certain people do I see the past again. I am trying to change this and I will. I just need time. Often a song can change us, define us, make us see something different, bring love to our door. This is my Song with my Partner. This song saved my life. My Partner showed me ‘Real Love’ a real life, a different life, a ‘Perfect Day’

Today I am no longer the tortured soul I once was after all the bad things I did. But I believe in Karma. I am in agony always, this is my Karma hurting me for the bad I did. I ask, what is your Karma? I am asking out loud not to one person. I said to a loved one, a person I would die for “You don’t know me” And I was right to say it, I said it in the wrong context. So I guess I should have said “We don’t know each other no more” But time heals all things I am sure of this. Only when we understand there are problems can we mend them. Sure I open my soul to the World a lot but I would rather be known for telling the truth, being Shaun and being honest. Why make yourself out to be something you ain’t? My 20 year old son left the family home 2 weeks ago now and I was deeply upset. A family member, saying what he felt needed said and meaning it in the right way said “Grow a pair” He may be right. But for me to change now would be an outcry on myself.

See, we are all alive, sadly some choose to become dead, dead to feelings, dead to the World and dead to themselves. I have never figured this out, but I will. I guess we all carry ourselves in a different way. Anyone with Fibro will know Fibro speaks for us sometimes. When stress happens, pain happens. For me to get people I truly love deeply to just understand that line, no more, no less, is hard. I need loved ones to know I smile, I am blessed, and I am happy. The past hauntes me, I can’t change the past so I don’t let it define me. It can haunt away, it won’t beat me. I can’t allow it. So here I am, love me, hate me, like me, struggle to understand me, whatever. Here I am!

This is Shaun, this is my life, this is why I write.

More love, less hate
Shaun

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